


New Start

by hagura



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Sickness, it is gonna be alot deeper than you think, silly love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2018-12-20 03:03:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11911878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hagura/pseuds/hagura
Summary: After discovering the dirty practices Vishkar uses, Symmetra decides to leave and rather stick with a newly reborn Overwatch to fulfill her life goal and make the world a better place.





	1. Beginning

"I'm truly flattered that you chose us." Said Winston with a calm but a little happy voice. He really was happy that I chose his little group of retired heroes, instead of a big worldwide known company who saved me from the dirt of the street, who raised me, who taught me everything I knew, and who gave me a whole new meaning to my life.  
"I'd rather say, that I did what was the best." My voice was cool and disciplined, like always, without any mark or fear or worry.  
Of course, I couldn't blame him for taking off my pure pink glasses which one Viskar glued on my face to create a perfect agent, no, a soldier. It wasn't his fault what Viskar did. Forcing people to feel happy wasn't the right way to make the world a better place. Living on the streets teaches you to enjoy the small things, but forcing people to pretend to be happy just because their life depends on it, was something I could never do, again.  
"After the Overwatch was banned the complex became a home for vandalism, alcohol, and drugs. So now we have just our small apartments renovated from the little money we've earned, but don't worry, they are comfortable. There's a kitchen, a bath room, and a living room with a second ground where your mattress is. Not all of our agents replied to my message, but I believe they will, sooner or later. So we will work on the other apartments to make them ready for living again." He said with a smile.  
"Alone?"  
"Pardon?" Asked Winston with a dull expression on his face. I knew something was wrong.  
"Will I live there alone?" I repeated my question.  
"During the three or four missions we had together, you got to know some of our agents, so I think it will be alright, we're a big family now." he smiled again.  
"Five, and please answer my question properly." I didn't need a family, I needed a place where I could help make the world a better place, so the people on streets won't end up like the scar marked girl I couldn't save before.  
"Like I mentioned to you, we didn't really have money to renovate all the apartments by now, so of course you would have a roommate, but just for the time, we renovate new apartments."He started to be a bit nervous.  
"Thank you for the answer Winston. I hope you would understand but I'm really exhausted from the trip here, I couldn't afford the Viskar transport anymore and traveling with such a package, really isn't easy for a lady, and I need to rest. I would appreciate if you show me my apartment so I could rest before I start to work." Worry and fear started to kick in. Living with another person who will be around at my free time, was something new. I didn't sleep in the same room with another person since my childhood. Viskar offered us a big apartment with a lot of rooms for our personal developments like bodybuilding or just relaxing before a mission.  
I didn't really want Winston to carry my luggage around, just because I mentioned that traveling by a train was uncomfortable. But feeling the release on my shoulders really stopped me from grabbing my suitcase from his big hands. I didn't have many belongings because most of our things at Viskar we got from them to be used especially for work. I was really surprised when they didn't want my hand back and even said if anything happened to it, I could feel free to come back for repairment.    
"This one is the door of your apartment. Athena will recognize your face and voice so you can enter anytime you want, without trouble."  
"Miss Symmetra, please turn your head to the panel next to the door and then say some sentences for the purpose of the voice recognizing." Said the calm voice of the Computer.  
I turned my head bit by bit like she told me and had a silly conversation about the weather with her, just to leave marks of my identity in the system for the security of the apartment.  
"Well, you can enter, I leave you to get to know him better." Said Winston.  
"Him?!" all my calm flew away like I never tried. I turned to Winston, who left before I had the chance to even protest against male roommates. I would understand to live with a woman, but living with a man would be awful. Just the thought of hiding every single woman-like items, like tampons or so, would be just a nightmare.  
"Why me?" I asked without thinking, and the door just opened. A pair of golden eyes glowing on the ash covered face, met mine. The smell of chemicals and old firework twisted my nose.  
"G'day. You're the new one, right?" His voice was crackly and really high for a man. I felt insecure right in the moment I saw him. And I don't even know if I wanna think about the condition of the apartment. Clothes everywhere, the couch covered in oil and dust, the table were full of bombshells and chemicals. I couldn't even take a deep breath to calm down because it would probably kill me.  
"Can you please open the window? Like all of them?" Was my first question directed to this disaster trying to look like a human being.  
"Why would I?" was a question instead of an answer.  
"Because the flat is dirty, full of your trash and I would need to clean it then at least open the windows." My mood was peppery so I loose my cool and just ordered around.  
"Don't need to be so moody, k?" He asked and stand up. Right in that moment, his pants hit the floor. I turned my head away in disgust.  
"Sorry 'bout that." He said and I heard the sound of opening windows.  
"the Ape said they will be controlled by lady Computer voice, after some time, now they're broken and are a little hard to open them just by hands, so feel free to ask me, I open them for you anytime. Sorry for the introduction, I'm Junkrat." He stuck his dirty prosthetic paw in front of my face with a big grin on his. I think it was red in the past but was so covered in dust and dirt that it looked completely black.  
"Oh my god, aren't you the one with that tall friend?" I asked and looked around. At the battlefield I only saw them together, the chaos pair I remember. He must be here too! Oh no! the flat is too small, I need to contact Winston, I can't live here with a dust covered trash rat and his big friend.  
"Oi, I'm tall my self, the fact just disappears next to hog." Hi didn't lower his hand.  
"And where's he?" I asked and looked around.  
"Oh, we can't live together now. The flats are too small and hog takes the whole place by himself. He got an apartment without this fancy second ground sleeping, he would crush it." Laughed Junkrat.  
Okay, so there are just the two of us. For some reason, it sounds even worse than the option with the giant man.  
"I'm sorry I can't shake your hand, It's covered in dust," I told him the truth.  
"Oh, k," he said and turned around to sit down on the couch. The only clean spot was on the floor next to the door. I put my stuff there. It was really disgusting that I could clearly see where he stepped in the past few days.  
"Do we have some stuff for cleaning?"  
"Dunno, I'm here just for a week. Been busy creating bombs, didn't have time to clean, you know?" This man...  
"thanks," I said with all the effort in the world to not blow up myself.  
While walking around the flat to find at least a broom, I felt cracking under my heels, and that made me feel really uncomfortable.  
Coming into the kitchen I found lots of untouched stuff. The dishes were surprisingly clean and organized. At least he can keep clean the plates he eats from. Oh, or he didn't even use them.  
After wiping all the dirt away I finally saw the wooden floor. The kitchen and the work table there were in a better shape than the living room. He knew he won't be alone, so he didn't touch the table in the kitchen.  
Just to be sure, I cleaned the chair too, so I can sit down somewhere after I finish all the cleaning. He fell asleep with an opened bombshell and a pencil in his hand. At least he didn't snore.  
"Athena?" I asked quietly so I won't wake him up.  
"You can talk to her only outside the flat by now, the mics are deaf right now." He said but didn't open his eyes.  
"Oh, thank you." So he's just resting. I stand up to ask her but he stopped me.  
"Oi, maybe I can help, ask me." He said and looked at me.  
"I want to get some food. I had a long trip and I need something to gain energy from."  
"There's a meat pie in the fridge. I cooked. If it's not too fancy for ya, eat it. We can cook dinner after I take a nap, so we can decide on some food after."  
"There isn't anything like a canteen if I get you right."  
"Like you said, no food without work. We need to go downtown and buy the food ourselves."  
"Oh, thank you," I said thank fully but, I really wasn't sure if I would eat anything made by an ash covered man. Even that my common sense told me that I shouldn't my stomach protested. My last meal was in the morning, my last Vishkar breakfast and I didn't enjoy it very well because everybody looked at me. I was the first employee in ten years who left the company just because he decided to. All my way from my apartment to the canteen and out of the company was accompanied with chatter and don't get expressions from the people around me.  
I didn't give them a real excuse to leave, but making a scandal would turn the whole company against me, like that I knew that if I would proof my skills in the world, I can return anytime without harm. But Winston said he can create me the same benefits like I had in Vishkar. I just need to wait until Overwatch will be back at the list of the great companies in the world.  
I was truly surprised when I opened the fridge. It was clean, he washed his hands before he did anything there. There were eggs, milk, the meat pie, some beverages and something in a foil. The pie looked really good, he can cook, that's good. I heated the pie on a plate and hoped it won't kill me. After a first bite, I knew he's a good cook. The pie was delicious, I never eat a meat pie, but that one was incredibly great.


	2. the accident

 „Hog’s in the city right now, so he can bring our food back at the flat if we hurry.” Said Junkrat. Walking down to the city weren’t really comfortable in my heels, the road was unused and walking on the crushed concrete made my feet skating from right to left with every step.  
“You’re okay?” he asked right after he noticed that I slowed down.  
“walking on high heels on such a scraggly roadway is a little unusual for me,” I said and tried to balance.  
“Your shoes aren’t really suited, that’s true.” He said looking at my heels.  
“I can’t understand how you can walk with that peg leg.”  
“habit.”  He shrugged his shoulders. Walking so close to such an unclean man was something I couldn’t think about in the past few weeks. He acted like there weren’t anybody who would teach him the right manners. We weren’t in any relationship, but he walked too fast and he waited for me at every fifth meter. He didn’t look angry or impatient, it just bugged me that my usually fast walk was ruined because of the road.  
“I would like to talk, but you don’t look like the talky one.” Said Junkrat and slowed down a bit next to me.  
“I don’t really like small talks,” I said and focused again at walking.  
“I will sound a little creepy, but don’t you want me to carry you? I’m used to heavy things on my back. Need to buy some new boots in the city, you can come, and choose one for yourself.” Said Junkrat and showed me his back.  
“If you’d showered before the walk, I would be really thankful, but you’re dirty, and what’s bad with my footwear?” I asked. Besides that I couldn’t walk on this thing called a road, I was fully capable of moving on any other surface.  
“The less fancy missions are just in such a terrain as this one, you would die before you kick them off from your feet.” I hate to admit it, but he was right, I didn’t really have anything else than heels or flippers. He looked pretty dumb but knew his stuff, thinking about it, this man will surprise me even more than I thought. He seems like a parentless genius, just like I was before Vishkar found me.  
The feeling of warm steel under the touch of my other hand made me feel a little homesick, even that Vishkar wasn’t my home anymore. Their engineers knew such things, that made all the panels on the hand completely feel the warmth of the sun or the touch of an another human but negate the pain. Of course, the first few prototype weren’t so great, and I had a lot of sleepless nights. After entering the electronics engineer university of Vishkar, I knew how to build a similar one. Did Junkrat build his arm alone? Just by looking at it I could tell that it's handmade, but did he asked somebody or build it himself? He’s a bomber, but is he capable of doing such a thing as building a complex functional arm, with, oh my god, just one arm?  
I couldn’t really tell. He can cook, that’s one of a big surprise, that such a man as he can cook.  He looks like a humanlike-disaster who won’t stay alive for a second in the world, but on the other hand, he seems to be pretty handy.  
“Can you remind me why we just don’t order food or go to a restaurant?” I asked.  
“Just like you, I want to live in my own space too. So even that the Gorilla is paying for everything, we need to be careful because we won’t have money for the flats. So we decided that we will cook by ourselves, is cheaper. Isn’t my hobby to listen on the boring meetings, but at this one I forgot to bring some paper to sketch on.” He said while he was waiting for me.    
So he does build things. Sure he does bombs, but you don’t really need to sketch on making a bomb. I made some while I was at the university, but I never really liked the purpose of these little killing shells. Maybe it was because of my disgust for killing. Like a member of Vishkar sometimes it happened that the only way to save my own life was to toss away the others, but it really wasn’t anything I wouldn’t regret. I never believed in God either, but I prayed for every life I blow out.  
“A little advice, bring something on the meetings with you, it's deadly boring there.” Said Junkrat.  
“meetings are arranged to help the group to work better together. Meetings are just about talking with the others to help each other to understand our abilities and find out how we can work together better. If you would listen on these meetings, maybe you could work better with the others too, not just with your friend RoadHog.”  
“Look, I didn’t join overwatch to help the people around. I don’t really care if the world will end up in a fire just like old good Australia, I just want Hog to be happy, I don’t need to cooperate or use any fancy word you wanna, I need him to be safe.”  Said Junkrat with a serious tone.  
“Did he wanted to join overwatch?” I asked. I can understand how he felt about his friends, I never had any, but I read about them. Having a person to who you are emotionally attached. Some back up you can use in your worse days, but I never needed anybody like that. I had my studies and the goal I wanted to achieve unless Winston ruined it.  
“Not really overwatch, but it was the only company who wanted us. Hog’s too old to live on the street and be in trouble all the time. Now we can do what we like legally without any suits who will put us in jail, or at least want to.”  
“So you came from Australia, that’s why your body looks so poor, oh sorry.”  
“Nah, I don’t really care about the look.  The bombs are the important beauties here.” He said and showed me a little shell in his hand. I stopped immediately.  
“oh no, no, no. This is just some sherry one, not a real boomer, just a baby. I like to carry with me lots of tricky little ones. I can put there anything I just want. They don’t do big damage and sometimes not at all, but they are enough to distract the enemies so if you decide, you can run.” He laughed a bit.    
In one second I heard a car horn, in the other, I was nearly on the ground. The only thing I could feel was his steel hand on my waist and pain in my right foot. He put me on the ground and wandered away. I was in such a shock I couldn’t breathe normally so while I was trying to catch my breath, I heard screaming behind me.  
“we’re really sorry missus, we will drive you to the city, sorry for the trouble.” Said a young lady who touched my shoulder. A complete stranger touched my shoulder. I felt uncomfortable. But it helped me to come back to my senses sooner.  
I lifted my head and saw Junkrat and two young people in swimsuits standing above me. Salt sparkled on their tanned skin and dark hair.  
“What…” I didn’t have time to ask anything before Junkrat lifted me from the ground.  
“we going to the city by car.” He grinned at me. I felt the little pieces of dirt on my skin and clothes which one stuck on me from his body. The disgust I felt was unbearable.  He put me in the car and sat next to me. Even that the young couple nearly went over me with their car, I was sorry for the sheets they had here. The ash from Junkrat, a newly even from me will surely stay here for a bit.  
The car had air condition, so after a long time, I felt a pleasant cool breeze on my skin. Junkrat looked really angry. He had his arms crossed on his chest and looked directly at the young driver of the car. He looked kind of funny, with such a grumpy face.


	3. The walk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Symmetra chose rather walk home in pain than ride a motorbike with a stranger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter would have been a lot longer like more than 10 times, but I'm afraid you would be too bored to read that much text. But If that isn't really a thing, I can post long chapter too, just let me know under the work  
> Or you can write me on my Tumblr https://hagurawrites.tumblr.com/

After they left us in front of the grocery store, they left as soon as possible. Of course, they apologized a lot and even gave me a bandage to fix my leg till we get home, but their sweetness was just because of Junkrats behavior.  
Looking at the dirt covered tall man in front of me, in their place I would be frightened too. They nearly run me off, so it's only understandable how rude Junkrat was.  
"need some help with the thing?" Asked Junkrat when he saw how I tried to figure out how to bandage my own foot without hurting my leg even more.  
"It would be really nice from you," doing it by myself would be a nonsense because the angle I should fold my legs would show everything under my skirt, what would be unthinkable in such a place as this.  
"can ya please get my wet tissues?" he said and showed me his left pocket on his pants. I put my hand inside his pocket with clenched teeth and prepared to lose the last five fingers on my hand I had, but nothing like that happened. I just easily found the tissues and pass them to him.  
Junkrat sat down on the ground right in front of the bench I was sitting on. It was really interesting to see how passionately he cleaned every fold on his prosthetic with the tissues. He really used a lot of them before the only dark thing on his hands was his nail polish and his glove.  
"may I?" He asked and carefully touched my foot.  
"you already have it." I hide my smile on my hand but he still saw it and smiled back. He took off my shoe so carefully that even if my leg would be broken, it won't hurt.  
"'m not sure if your shoe will fit after I put this on your foot." He said and started to bandage my foot.  
"If it would be too tight tell me." I didn't know such a man can have sun a gentle touch. Of course, after working with such dangerous chemicals you need to have a steady hand, but I never thought he can use his prosthetic hand witch such a delight. The skin on his hands was hard and dry, but his touch was gentler than Mercy's when she checked on the leftover of my nerves from my left hand.  
"I can buy some slippers and go home with them, I don't really mind. I don't really need to dress by the overwatch dress code, so it's really okay." I smiled and shoe myself on. The heels were terrible. They were too small to walk in them. I was really glad that the store was so close. Right after we went in I saw some cute one-use ballerina shoes with a paper-thin sole. It was a perfect fit. Walking on them was much easier than in my heels.  
Junkrat stuck a lot of stuff in our basket, so it looked like he prepared for the apocalypse. Lot of cans, sweets and some chips.  
"Will we really cook something out of this?" I asked with an unbelieving expression.  
"you better believe," He returned me a big smile. I put some fruits and vegetables along with some pita bread and butter.  
the lady at the cash desk looked confused. I gave her only one of the ballerinas and clearly, this wasn't the reason.  
"Hog will be here in any second, you sure you don't want him to ride you home?" he asked. But even the thought of sitting behind a sweaty, smelly and dirty giant made my stomach doing backflips.  
"I'm sure it would be just a trouble for your friend, so I rather walk home with you," I said looking on the ground to protect me before falling again, so he won't put me on the Bike by force.  
\----------------------------------------  
"Here's the loot. I bought everything you wanted, please drop it by the front door, we will find it there, thank you." His friend didn't reply, he just nodded, put the bags in his lap and was gone before Junkrat had a chance to ask me about the ride again.  
"I put your shoes in a separate bag and gave it to him if you don't mind." He said.  
"I just hope he won't lose them, it was a present from a friend." I clearly remembered when Sarah gave me them. She ordered them for me especially for my birthday, even that I never celebrate it before or after the gift.  
"Don't worry, he doesn't look like it, but he really can look after his things." Said Junkrat while we were walking back to the old Overwatch building.  
"Did you know I will come?" I said thinking about all the untouched stuff in the kitchen.  
"I did know somebody will come, but to be honest, I thought it would be a fella. It's a little less troublesome for him to live with me because he's a man too. I know women like their things clean and hidden.  I don't really mind to live with anybody, but you look like a lady who appreciates her privacy, what is impossible in the flat we're living in." He said. I never thought that a man like him worries about such a thing.  
"I would be remarkable to have my own space, but we need to work with what we got," I said and tried to be a little more friendly. I would live with this man for some time from now on. The new flats won't be available for a while, and I knew about it.  
"Oh right, wait, I'll be right back. No, don't wait, walk, I'm a bit faster, so go, I'll catch you in the way." He said and run away. His running was funny. The pegleg did an excellent work so he looked like an old man trying to catch a bus which will wait for him anyway.  
Even that he told me to walk, I was better for me to sit down on the rock near and rest a bit. My leg hurt, the bandage, of course, didn't heal it, so I needed to rest but I was too ashamed to ask him to do so.  
I was an agent trained to push myself through any pain, but right now, nobody from Vhiskar was watching my steps, my act or my dialogues. I was alone with this crazy bomber and I felt a little comfort in my words even that I carefully choose every word I told him.  
The shame came from the training we had since I first came to Vishkar. Every trainer I had was a dictator who wanted from us just the best, they didn't even let me use my prosthetic arm for most of the time. The only key to get in their likes was to be the best. That was the only thing I did, all my life. I was the best all my life, and now, I left the company, where I had everything. A big flat, connexions, the assurance that at old age, I will have no worries. Now I have a flat which one I have to share with a man. Of course, he's really not the worst I could get, but his disorganization made my comfort to fell somewhere on the bottom of the ocean.  
"Need some more time to rest, or we can go?" He asked with fastened breath. He clearly ran.  
"If you're good we can go," I said and tried to find something to help myself to stand up. With a bright smile, he offered his hand to help. It was still clean, so it was a little easier for me to touch it. He was really careful so my hand won’t slip. When he lifted me, I realized how interesting were his eyes. I never saw anybody with this exact shade of yellow before. I saw some photos of the Talon sniper, but her eyes were more like a citron, Junkrats eyes were golden.  
’’why did you exchange your fancy company for Overwatch? Did they pay more?’’  He clearly minded just the money.  
’’no, they pay a lot less than Vishkar’’ I said with a small cold kick in my chest. I was still worried about the future. What if Overwatch can't stand on its own legs again? What if we can't get the trust of people? Vishkar never worried about some reputation in the rows of simple people, we were a business company who cared most of the opinion of our other funding companies.  
"why would you choose another company then? did they treat you bad?"  
"No! At least not me. The ideals they made were not enough for me. They hurt people and forced them to happiness. I didn't want to be a part of such company" I said while I slowed down.  
"you need to rest again?" He asked and tried immediately to find something suitable for me to sit down.  
"No, I just need to slow down a little, I can walk a little more" I sighed and hated myself for that. I wanted to just stand up and go, with all the grace I had. Might the family air of Overwatch changed me so fast. It really was a great thing to see smiling faces of my colleagues not because they got an order for it, but because they were happy from a successful mission.  
"Than blow them up!" Said Junkrat so suddenly that I nearly stepped wrong.  
"Pardon?" I gave him a confused look with a chance to explain himself.  
"If the company is so bad, blow the whole thing up while the suits are inside!" This time he didn't smile like a maniac how I would imagine it. His expression was calm and completely serious.  
"Are you mad? That's impossible! And by the way a terrible idea!" This man really didn't have any manners.  
"I blew up a lot of folks in my life,  no regret even one!" He sounded awfully proud of himself. He was visible into his little idea because he suddenly stopped to try to communicate with me in an educated way, he started to use that annoying accent of his I heard too many times on missions. I knew why I never had the urge to talk with that man, he had so poor speech.  
"Junkrat! You killed people. They had families and friends, people who cared about them, who was worries sick why they are late for dinner. You can't end a someone's life with such a lightheaded attitude as that!" There were things I would never be able to do. Kill a person, a human feeling and thinking being, is something I did plenty of times in the name of upper good. But there wasn't a night they wouldn't follow me, asking me why didn't I choose another path. I tried to always calm myself with the knowledge that Vishkar is the light path, the path I should follow, the one leading to a brighter future. Realizing what path Vishkar followed itself, made these nights even harder for me. Not just sleep, but meditate or even read a book. Sometimes I needed to bury myself completely to work just to forgot in what cost I'm living in this clean and beautiful place. And after It was nearly impossible for me to even eat their dishes, I needed to escape. I didn't leave with a gratitude, to show them the light path, without them, but to run away from the reality they tried to curl and hid from me.  
"You see? that's your problem, lot of money, no morality and you just left. I'm prepared to die in every second, regret nothing. I lived my life as fully as I could, robbed as many banks as I could, found a partner who turned out to be a friend. I'm satisfied as I am."  
"Enjoying killing a living being is a terrible pleasure, Junkrat." I couldn't look in his face. I felt the anger that builds up in my body, I wanted to crush some hard light object which won't mind at all.  
"Never said I enjoyed it," He said looking at the sky. I managed to look on his face, this time I couldn't read his expression at all.  
"Growing in 'stralia isn't a pleasure at all. I never knew the land before the big boom that happened, I was too small to remember. My parents die pretty quick from radiation poisoning trying to feed me with the good stuff, they eat only radiated animals which managed to stay alive after the bomb was dropped. After they died, I needed to hide, or die, to kill or be killed. So no much of a choice back then." He somehow, reminded me of my life before Vishkar, was my original story that bad too? I somehow couldn't remember.  
"How did your parents look?" Was a question which flew from my mouth immediately. Junkrat gave me a long thinking look.  
"I... don't really remember, just that mom had real great hair, long and brown which always shined on the sun." He awkwardly smiled at the memory of his mother. She must have been beautiful, if nothing else, her soul must have been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading all this wall of text :) Leave me a comment so I can get better at writing don't fear to criticize me :)


	4. chapter 3continued

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really want to apologize that I cut off the chapter last time but I will follow up on where I left off. I‘m terribly sorry for that.  
> And I wanted to tell from now on all the chapters will be as long, if no longer than this one. For all of my fics

"What did your parents look like?" Was a question which flew from my mouth immediately.  
  
Junkrat gave me a long thinking look.  
  
"I... don't really remember, just that mom had really great hair, long and brown, which always shined in the sun." He awkwardly smiled at the memory of his mother. She must have been beautiful, if nothing else her soul must have been. Dying in horrible pain from radiation sickness just to protect her precious child, who turned out to be a criminal.  
  
Once I heard that no matter what you do, your mother will always love you. Did my mother even know I still existed? Would she care if I showed up in front of her?  
  
I spent plenty of time and money to find my parents, but it seemed like I was created, not born. No records about my existence before Vishkar, not even the DNA test found anybody in the whole world who has visited a doctor in his life. Maybe they died after I was born, or they were too poor to really have a record at any doctor.  
  
I looked up to see his expression and at the moment I saw the sudden sadness in his eyes, I forgot to watch my step and the ground was suddenly dangerously coming closer. I shut my eyes to prepare for the ground kissing my face, but I suddenly stopped. He was holding me so firmly by my hip that it almost hurt. He carefully put his other hand on my back and supported me so I could stand on the ground again. When he made sure I was standing on my own, he let go.  
  
"Do you wanna rest?" He asked and led me to the nearest piece of rock we could find. After I nearly fell, it was a big relief to sit down.  Junkrat threw himself on the ground and lay on the fresh grass as if it was a comfortable bed.  
  
"Mercy will fix you, no worries here. We aren't that far now," he said and closed his eyes so he could rest too. His face was ashy and dusty but I could still see the dark circles which sat under his eyes. He seemed exhausted and unhealthy, telling by his bony body. He ate properly, I think. I saw him eating a lot. Did he have health issues because of the long stay in Australia? Did he chase for money to pay for some kind of cure for something? Or was he just bored?  
  
"You know, living just for the money won't make you happy," I said like I knew what could make a mad bomberman happy. I couldn't even tell how to find happiness myself, and here I'm lecturing a man who has been through a lot more than I even want to imagine.  
  
"You know, Symmetra, ace architect from Vishkar, I don't really have any other options for happiness." His tone was hard, and even I could read from it that he didn't want to talk about his bad decisions of the past. Fortunately for me, because I didn't know how to react to this. I never had deep conversations with anybody so I didn't know how to react, and I was sure this wasn't the day I should start.  
  
"How far are we anyway?" I tried to ask in the least awkward tone I could manage.  
  
"Ten minutes of normal walking. How does your leg feel?" he asked popping open one eye.  
  
"I think I can manage the walk." I smiled and put my hand on the rock so I could stand up, but Junkrat was faster and jumped up so he could help me.  
  
I swear to all gods, I was never so clumsy in just one day. Even though he helped me stand up, when I took the first step I forgot that I needed to put extra effort into the angle of my foot, and I fell onto him out of pain. I could protest with all my might but he didn't let me walk on my own by any chance.  
  
But carrying me princess style wasn't the best idea for a ten-minute walk so he piggybacked me on his back while my naked thighs were pressing on his skin. I managed to put my skirt in a way my panties weren't showing to the rocks on the road, although there really wasn't anybody to see me, but I still felt ashamed. I was never so close to anybody in my life, it was a strange feeling.  
  
I could have sworn that Junkrat was as nervous as I was because as chatty as he was all the time, he didn't even sigh during the entire ten minutes. He was just walking, minding his own business by looking on the ground so he wouldn't trip over a rock by any chance.  
  
The only sound I could listen to was the rock cracking under his boot. His walk was as unique as he himself. One step with the boot, one step with the pegleg. I tried not to think about rubbing in certain places thanks to his funny walk. I focused on the cracking and the wood hitting the ground.  
  
Why would somebody in such a modern era choose a pegleg anyway? He had a pretty great hand, so why did he choose something so old and simple as a piece of thick branch, instead of a flexible properly-crafted leg with sensors. He could have a fully-feeling leg, but he walked around like a pirate.  
  
  
The arrival to Mercy was my rescue. When he put me down on one of the beds in Mercy's office, I had a chance to see his red back and how sweaty it got. It must have been really uncomfortable carrying around a full grown woman with such thighs as I had. I wanted at least to thank him that I didn't have to suffer through the trip walking, even though I had my own ways to suffer, but he was gone as fast as he could. He nearly ran out of the nurse room.  
  
"Satya," Mercy said my name with such a patience. She always sounded like a mother. "I couldn't guess that it was you at first, your heels are missing..." she didn't finish and rushed to me right after she caught a glimpse of the white bandage on my leg. "Oh dear, what happened?" She asked, taking my leg in her small hands. Her hands were a lot smaller than Junkrat's, and suddenly the bandage looked a lot more serious in them.  
  
"While walking to the store a side of a car hit me. I don't have really clear memories because I was surprised and shocked a bit, but Junkrat took care of it so we could at least return." A strange smile sat on Mercy's face as she was freeing my foot from the cloth.  
  
"He's a good guy, even though he's against that idea." She smiled again. Her staff was just next to her so grabbing and using it was easy, but Mercy didn't even look at it. She just put some kind of green glowing bracelet around my swollen leg and the pain slowly disappeared, but my leg wasn't healing at all.  
  
"You need to wear it for at least five hours so your foot can heal completely, but don't do gymnastics in the following few days, it might be still a little sensitive." She stood up and with a satisfied smile sat down behind her desk like we were finished.  
  
"Can I ask why you didn't use your staff?" I could not understand why would she use something less effective.  
  
"Using instant healing is really remarkable on the battlefield, but not in the spectrum of real life and longtime usage of those techniques. With instant healing, some of your tissues don´t have to heal properly and it will show only after some time, and it will be much worse in old age. That's why I use this much less risky but slower method, to heal your wound properly. This technology was used on Genji Shimada's body. If I had just a little more time, I could have restored a lot more of his organic body. But Overwatch was in a hurry through that uprising and they needed him immediately. Poor boy, I hope he will show up. Of course, I would understand if he has already refused the invitation, and Winston is just too kind to tell me." She smiled sadly.  
  
"Why would he refuse?" Overwatch gave him a full, new body. Yes, a robotic body, but a body nonetheless, and they spent a lot of money, time and effort to help him.  
  
"I'm sure you can clearly remember that when Vishkar gave you your first prosthetic arm, you went through even more terrible pain than when you lost your limb. After somebody's nearly whole body was replaced and they forced him to wake up from artificial sleep just to fight in the uprising, making him feel how much he owes to Overwatch, I could understand that he wouldn't be happy to return to such place. And on top of that, we are still counted as terrorists. I can understand why they shut us down, we weren't much different from the army, and we caused much more damage than they could pay." she turned her head to look at the old yellowish photo of the old Overwatch crew.  
  
"Vishkar caused us a lot of pain, and not just physical one. They made us make bad decisions in our lives, and we followed their rules each time to come back to the main base, to our homes, to the luxury cells they shoved us in because they stripped us from family or anyone dear in our lives. Do you really think he would think the same about Overwatch? About you?" My voice was full of justice and kindness but honestly, I just made myself feel even worse that I let them control me.  
  
"I hope not." She sighed. I didn't want to continue in this awkward conversation. Being a part of Overwatch led to strange conversations about private lives and feelings. In Vishkar, nobody had time for feelings or personal life, the only problems we had were the company-based problems and we were solving them all the time, which for a good reason didn't let us create bonds with our colleagues. Of course, I had to have some conversations in the time I lived there, but those paper thin so-called friendships burned as soon as I stuck my heel out of the main Vishkar building.  
  
"So after five hours, I can get this thing off?" I asked, showing her my naked foot. I hoped that would lead the topic away and instead of talking to Angela Ziegler, main healer and doctor of Overwatch, I would talk to Mercy away, the professional medic who just did her job.  
  
"Oh, yes, of course, my dear. If you consider that you don't need it anymore, then just bring it to me. If I am not here, I will be in my room. The room with the big angel's wings on it, you surely won't miss it." She gave me a smile and wandered away somewhere into the back of her office to find something in her papers. She surely had a lot of work after all of us came in and not all of her new patients had even seen good medical care in their lives.  
  
Mentioning those particular someones, I was a little afraid to go back to the apartment. Junkrat was there and I didn't really feel like talking anymore today. Living with somebody meant a lot of talking and getting to know each other. I liked to live in peace and quiet without forcing myself to make friends in my own apartment.  
  
Of course, I knew that it would be only one sentence that separated me and my days without any other conversations. But I really wanted to learn how to be a proper human being. I felt like I was isolated from people, from normal development of relationships. Having a chatty roommate might help me get past the barrier, to learn how to talk to people without putting too much effort in it.  
  
Although I knew he would let me be if I asked him, the trip to the room was twice as long as it should take. I admit I stood in front of the door for a while, such a while that Athena asked me if I forgot my password or that maybe I lost my voice but that she could ask me a few questions and verify me manually, so I could get to the room. I shook my head and hoped that she would guess that I just needed some time before I gathered all my will to actually enter the room.  
  
In the end, my fears were unreasonable, Junkrat wasn't even in the room. His table was a bigger mess than when we left, but of course, it wasn't my business. I had everything I wanted, peace, quiet, and privacy.  I sat down on the newly cleaned couch and closed my eyes.  
  
\----------------------------------------------  
  
Opening my eyes didn‘t make any difference than when they were closed. The brightest object was the moon itself. I felt a little dizzy and definitely hungry.  
  
The narcotic smell of curry made my mouth water. Junkrat must have been already at home. Thinking about somebody being at home, at the home we shared, made me feel a little strange. I couldn‘t understand my own feelings towards the new situation I happened to be a part of. Sharing my personal space with somebody else, I thought that would never happen. In Vishkar you never got a roommate, the only person you could share a room with was your lover. Even then, if you shared rooms, sleeping in the same bed didn't occur very often. Vishkar took care of the schedules, so the lovers never met in missions or even in the office. They told us when we could get pregnant and when we needed to return to work. We couldn't be with our children much more than with our lovers, so Vishkar took care of the education of the children and providing free-time activities for them.  
  
Most of the agents were there from their childhood, just like myself. We knew that letting the nannies and trainers raise our children wouldn't be the childhood we wanted for them, so Vishkar babies weren't that common.  
  
’’... and what about your headaches, is it better?‘‘ I heard Mercy’s voice from the kitchen.  
  
‘‘Don‘t know doc, I can live, that‘s enough‘‘  Junkrats voice was sharp and cold as if he was annoyed by her question. I didn't want to interrupt so I just laid back down on the couch.  
  
‘‘Look, Jamison...’’ Mercy started but she was immediately interrupted.  
  
‘‘Don‘t call me by my name. You have no rights to do it!‘‘ he was really angry, he took his name as serious as I did. Nobody could call me by my name, not even my bosses. I felt a bit ashamed that I let Mercy use it back in her office and I didn‘t say anything. There was the possibility that she would consider it a normal thing and call me by it all the time. I need to have a talk with her when I return her bracelet.  
  
‘ I‘m sorry Junkrat I forgot about that. But even though I‘m sorry I won‘t change the topic. You are not in Australia anymore, you need to tell me everything you feel so I can help you get healthy so you can build on that.‘‘ I heard how somebody pulled a chair and sat down, probably Junkrat.  
  
‘‘I don‘t see the purpose doc, I‘m a Junker who has no possibilities other than being here. Nobody would take me and Hog. It was great to rob all those banks and just have fun with the money, that‘s how we lived for a long time. I‘m a criminal, there is nothing for me to be healthy for or crap like that. As long as good ol‘ Hog has a place to sleep in, I‘m happy. He‘s a lot older, I don‘ give him more than ten years, then I'm gonna be alone again. And I don‘t really care if healthy or not.‘‘ His voice was so... calm. He took all those facts as real as they were. He wasn‘t sad or angry, he thought about those eventualities a lot, even I could tell.  
  
‘‘With my care, even Roadhog can live a peaceful life until his nineties but I need you to cooperate, I can‘t help if you don‘t tell me anything,‘‘ said Mercy, pressing him to answer. That was followed by a big sigh.  
  
‘‘I can‘t sleep properly. And now it‘s even harder.‘‘ He said.  
  
‘‘Is it because of your headaches? Did you throw up in the last week? Are you eating properly?‘‘ I heard how Mercy stood up and made a few steps.  
  
‘‘I think it‘s because I need to get used to the quiet sound of Symmetra's breathing. I‘m used to Hog's snoring and I‘m kinda waiting for her to start to snore. I know she won‘t and that‘s strange.‘‘ He said. I heard people complaining about snoring, but I never heard anybody's complaints about people sleeping too peacefully.  
  
‘‘I know it's hard to suddenly not hear somebody sleeping when you are used to it. But I can assure you that Symmetra is completely healthy and she won‘t die at night,‘‘ said Mercy.  
  
Now I got it, he couldn‘t sleep because he thought if he fell asleep he might find me dead in the morning. It made sense, in such a place as Australia you never knew if you were ever going to wake up again when you go to sleep. He was used to hearing Roadhog snore, that's how he knew he was alive. For some reason, I felt guilty that I didn‘t snore like a fifty-year-old man.  
  
‘‘I know, I know, no need to tell me. Second, my hand is itchy, sometimes it suddenly feels like it was just cut off,‘‘ he said.  
  
‘‘Don‘t sleep with it on then. The skin under it needs to breathe, the same for your leg. My last question, because you didn‘t answer before, did you vomit?‘‘ asked Mercy. A long pause followed.  
  
‘‘Junkrat?‘‘ asked Mercy again.  
  
‘‘Yes, after I dropped Symmetra in the lab.‘‘ He said.  
  
‘‘How was it, what was it. What did you eat before it? I‘m sure it wasn‘t because of her weight because your Rip-tire is heavier and you carry it around all the time.‘‘  
  
‘‘Just water, I had only breakfast, I didn‘t feel like eating the entire day. I drank only water.‘‘ He said. So he is sick, is it because of the long stay in Australia? When that thought crossed my mind I realized I cared too much. I had no right to listen to this conversation and making my own conclusions out of it.  
  
‘‘Did you take the pills I gave you?‘‘ asked Mercy, heading for the kitchen door. Another long pause.  
  
I turned around so I could pretend I was still asleep. Why did I do that? I lived there. If they wanted to talk privately, they could‘ve met in her office. Still, I decided to not make a fool of myself.  
  
‘‘Then take two after dinner and pay me a visit in the morning. No breakfast,‘‘ said Mercy and opened the door. The sharp light drew a yellow square on the couch I was laying on. She took off her heels so she wouldn‘t wake me up. When she left I heard Junkrat turning off the stove and heading out off the kitchen. I hoped that he would visit the toilet but instead he stepped as close as he could. We nearly touched, I was sure. Was he looking at me? He was looking at me! He sighed and went back to the kitchen. Was he making sure I was alive?  
  
‘‘I‘m okay‘‘ I said quietly, I wasn‘t sure if he could hear me.  
  
‘‘It‘s really not nice to eavesdrop, Ms. Order,‘‘ he said and I heard a smile in his voice.  
  
‘‘I wasn‘t aware you were going to talk in the kitchen,‘‘ I said in my defense.  
  
‘‘I don‘t really care. So will you be so kind to lift your noble bottom and come to eat? Your stomach was making noises since I came back.‘‘ He said and I heard how he put two plates on the kitchen table.  
  
I should have at least sat up more slowly because my head started to spin. Now I felt like throwing up myself.  
  
‘‘Can I please ask you for a glass of cold water?‘‘ I asked with lowered voice because I felt like every word was going to bring up my breakfast right back where it came from.  
  
‘‘Slept too much, huh?‘‘ He asked giving me the cold glass. A smug smile played on his face. Oh god, this man.  
  
The liquid cooled down my hot head and I started to feel better. Walking to the kitchen table was a little troublesome, I still felt my ankle. The curry looked absolutely delicious. I couldn't even remember when I ate curry last time. Maybe when Sarah made it for me once when I was sick. She called it miracle curry, and of course, it surely was. It was so spicy that I was cured in three days.  
  
However, Junkrat's curry was really delicious. When I lifted my head I found out he had no curry on his plate, just plain rice. Was it because he didn‘t feel well?  
  
He caught my gaze. I thought he was going to give me a smile like he usually did when I started to analyze his face, but he looked away. I had too little information about him so I couldn‘t tell anything. I was terrible with people, I never knew what I should say or rather avoid in conversations. I must admit I was always curious, but my trainers taught me the hard way that this was an extremely bad character feature. But now there wasn‘t anybody who would punish or scold me, the worst that could happen was that Junkrat was going to shout at me, and then I would know that I really did something bad.  
  
‘‘Are you feeling unwell?‘‘ I couldn‘t ask him more professionally. Making friendly contact really was exhausting.  
  
‘‘Yes‘‘ he answered simply. He didn‘t want to talk about it, I get it. I looked at his spoon for a bit, he played with the rice, shaping it into little balls, then rolling them on the plate. But he didn‘t lift it to his mouth even once.  
  
He looked at the rice like at an enemy. Knowing his temper, he would rather blow the whole plate up, than eat it.  
  
I took a deep breath. This might be the worst idea in my life, I never asked this question and I swear to the gods, all of them, that if this turns out to be as terrible as I think, I would never let those words slip my mouth again.  
  
‘‘Do you want to talk about it? Can I help?‘‘ I really did that.  I asked a personally sacrificing question. I gave a mad bomberman the opportunity to tell me that I could shut up and leave him and his crazy life alone.  
  
Junkrat was quiet. I knew this was a bad idea, how could it even come to my mind? A fresh ex-Vishkar agent, raised to create no bonds, asking a mad bomberman, who lived most of his life in the cruel post-apocalyptic Australia, to have a little chit-chat about his problems, even though they really met yesterday for the first time. What could possibly go wro...  
  
‘‘No need to be polite and ordered around me. No need to ask me. You aren't in debt just because I cook for ya— ehm, you‘‘ for a split second he spoke as carelessly as with anybody, then he corrected himself so he could speak with me in a cultivated way. I wasn‘t the one caring about him. It was him who tried to make everything friendly and ordered for me, so I could feel at home, so I could be comfortable, so I would not be bothered by him and his habits and troubles.  
  
‘‘You weren‘t here so I wouldn‘t hear or see you vomiting‘‘ I said out loud my realization. His spoon dropped and he looked at me. In his eyes, there was something I could not read. Was he surprised? Was he angry? Or both at the same time?  
  
His face suddenly turned white with a little green undertone. His eyes widened but he didn’t break contact. I stood up to give him anything I could help him with, but he jumped up and ran. Not to the toilet, away.  
  
I was left in the kitchen, standing, looking at his plate, two white pills were looking at me from one of the rice balls. He wasn‘t able to take those pills. From their conversation, I could tell it wasn‘t normal for him to throw up more than once in a week.  
  
Now or never, Satya, be a friend. For the first time in your life, be a friend!  
  
I ran out of the room and ran directly to Mercy's office. The always opened doors were closed. I knocked in a hurry.  
  
‘‘Give me a second.‘‘ I heard Mercy rushing to the door.  
  
‘‘Oh Symmetra, dear what happened?‘‘ She had somebody already inside.  
  
‘‘Is Junkrat here?‘‘ I asked hoping I can turn back to the room with no other worries.  
  
‘‘No, what happened?‘‘ She seemed troubled the second she heard his name.  
  
‘‘I‘m sorry, I eavesdropped on your conversation. Is it normal for him to throw up twice a day?‘‘ I went straight to the point.  
  
‘‘Oh, no it‘s not. Did he take his pills yet? Do you know?‘‘ she asked, looking past me, already thinking of all sorts of possibilities.  
  
‘‘No‘‘  
  
‘‘Great‘‘ She said sarcastically and turned back and went for something in her office. She returned with a small sticky package. Inside was green liquid. It nearly looked like those pods used for washing clothes, but this one wasn‘t so full.  
  
‘‘This will stop the nausea, and prevent any diarrhea. He knows what it is. When he calms down, bring him here please.’’ She said and was prepared to go inside when I reached out and grabbed her hand.  
  
‘‘He‘s not home’’ I said.  
  
‘‘He might be at Roadhog's room. That's near the workshop. Or outside behind the storage,‘‘ she said and shut the door. Oh, right, she had somebody inside. I forgot.  
  
Roadhog's room was closer but I didn‘t want to go there so I went straight to the storage. I grabbed a bottle of water and a package of napkins from the little kitchen so he could at least clean himself.  
  
When I got near the storage I was sure he was there. He cursed and punched something really hard. When I showed up, he looked at me as if he saw a ghost. It didn‘t stop me.  
  
He turned his face so I could not see him.  
  
‘‘Don‘t come here please.‘‘ his voice was weak and ... ashamed. It still didn‘t stop me. I was near when he curled up an started to vomit. I was used to people throwing up. Our trainer made always sure that we acted as he told us, else we got punched right in the stomach. We had to throw up a lot before we learned not to eat at all before training.  
  
I put my hand on his back, holding back my breath. When he stopped, I gave him the green package. He shoved it into his mouth and took the water to clean his mouth a little. I created a hard light toothbrush and gave it to him.  
  
‘‘I don‘t have any toothpaste but at least it helps a bit,‘‘ I said as I let go of his back. A shake went through his whole body when I let him go. His muscles were suddenly as in a spasm. I put my hand back and it faded. He needed to feel somebody was there.  
  
‘‘Thank you.‘‘ He said so quietly I barely heard him.  
  
‘‘It‘s okay. You carried me home. I owe you.‘‘ I smiled.  
  
I smiled. Why did I smile?  
  
‘‘You don‘t owe me anything, I would do it again if it‘s needed.‘‘ My heart skipped a beat and my cheeks flushed.  
  
Really?! In such a situation? With such a man? I must have gone crazy. NO! I just feel sorry for him. Yes, that‘s it. It has nothing to do with his tallness, wild blonde hair, and deep golden eyes. Not even with his sweet smile, sharp honesty or pure kindness he shows me with no second thoughts.  
  
I carefully lifted my hand to see if the reaction would still be so aggressive.  
  
‘‘Can you leave it there?‘‘ he asked while he curled up a little more.  
  
‘‘Yes, of course.‘‘ His skin was hot, much hotter than mine. I felt like my cheeks turning red, again. I tried to focus on something else when I saw the bloody mark on the wall next to us. How could I miss that? It was impressively big. He must have punched the wall with his hand, that was the only thing that made sense.  
  
‘‘Can you show me your hand in return?‘‘ I asked. Junkrat froze for a moment, then handed me his prosthetic.  
  
‘‘No, the organic one.‘‘ He didn‘t move. He was like a little child, he felt guilty for what he did, and now he wanted to deny his acts.  
  
‘‘I will kneel down and look at your face.‘‘ By now I knew that was the last thing he wanted.  
  
‘‘Jeezus,‘‘ he said, giving me his hand. Scrapes were covering his knuckles and the rest of his hand was covered in nearly dried blood. It looked horrible. But nothing that Mercy couldn‘t fix.  
  
‘‘Do you want to go back?‘‘ I asked, still holding his sweaty back. In a surprise, he turned around and I finally saw his face. Oh, he punched the wall even with his head. I forgot people did even these kinds of things. He noticed my widened eyes looking directly at the wound and he turned back to hide his face again. We stayed in silence for a quite a while.  
  
‘‘You didn‘t scold me‘‘ he said, surprised.  
  
‘‘I believe Roadhog did that quite often, but I have no right to do so. Everyone has his own way how to deal with his inner demons.‘‘ I closed my eyes and touched his hand again to help him stand up. I found out that the piece of wood he had as his leg was totally shattered and it was a lot shorter than his organic leg.  
  
I put his hand around my shoulders and we left the stained place be, hoping that nobody happened to visit it before the next rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading all this wall of text :) Leave me a comment so I can get better at writing don't fear to criticize me :)


End file.
